Take a 20-Minute Break in the Middle of an Argument When You're Losing Control

When your heart rate spikes above 100 during a conflict, your body enters fight-or-flight mode and your capacity for empathy, nuance, and problem-solving drops to near zero. This is called physiological flooding, and no amount of willpower can think clearly through it. The fix is simple: take a 20-minute break. Not to stew -- to let your cortisol drop. Go for a walk, breathe, do something unrelated. Then come back. The issue will still be there, but now you can actually address it like an adult.