Stop Arguing With People in Your Head

You know the scenario: you're in the shower, replaying a conversation, preparing a devastating comeback for someone who isn't there. The rehearsed confrontation. The perfect speech you'll never deliver. The problem isn't just that it's pointless — these mental arguments raise your cortisol as if the fight were real. Your body doesn't know the difference between an imagined conflict and an actual one. You walk out of the shower genuinely worked up. Worse, the imagined version of the other person will never say what the real one would say. You're shadow-boxing a phantom you built yourself. When you notice it happening, name it — "I'm rehearsing a fight" — and redirect your attention elsewhere.